


FRIDAY, I'm In Love

by heyjupiter



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Minor Bruce Banner/Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Minor Michelle Jones/Peter Parker, Science Boyfriends, Science Bros, Science Bros Week 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-06-20 09:21:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15531156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heyjupiter/pseuds/heyjupiter
Summary: In order to get a good sample size of opinions, Peter Parker seeks dating advice from a wide range of sources, some of whom are more qualified than others.





	FRIDAY, I'm In Love

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Science Bros Week 2018, prompt #6: Friday. (Better late than never?)
> 
> Title is from The Cure song of the same name (different capitalization).

Bruce was an excellent listener, until he wasn't. Tony had learned the hard way to check in with Bruce if he was saying something he really wanted to be heard--sometimes when prompted for a reply, Bruce would guiltily reveal that his quiet, thoughtful expression had actually been at best because he was working out a complicated equation in his head, or at worst because he'd been swept into some kind of traumatic flashback. 

Sometimes when he went to prompt Bruce for a reply, Tony would realize Bruce was asleep. Sometimes, that was actually fine--sometimes Tony really just needed to talk things out for himself. But when he wanted Bruce's input, he asked for it throughout the conversation, rather than waiting for the end of it.

Peter hadn't learned this lesson yet.

Tony and Peter had gone outside to test out a new model of webshooter. It worked great, although Peter had been a little distracted. When they'd come back inside, Bruce had been sitting on a couch in the common room with a scientific journal open on his lap and a thoughtful expression on his face. Peter had gone straight to Tony's usual spot, next to Bruce, and started nervously monologuing.

Intrigued, Tony had flopped down on a chair across the room from them observe. Tony had already fielded a slightly different version of this question, but he was interested to hear Bruce's response--if Peter managed to elicit one at all. Peter chattered away at Bruce, whose gaze was focused on a blank space in the middle ground. Tony was pretty sure Bruce hadn't even noticed either of them enter the room. (Tony generally made a point of being noticed when he entered a room, but Peter had cut off Tony's usual approach.)

"...so what do you think, Dr. Banner?" Peter concluded. "Dr. Banner?"

Bruce winced and shook his head. "Peter, I'm so sorry, could you repeat that?"

"Oh sure, I asked what you thought about it?"

"No, sorry, I mean...all of it? Could you please repeat all of it?"

Peter deflated slightly--Bruce was usually more polite to him than Tony was.

"Don't take it personal, kid," Tony said. "Sometimes Bruce is just on another planet. Hopefully not literally, ever again, but figuratively...pretty regularly."

Bruce rubbed the back of his neck and nodded. "Pretty much, sorry…I didn't even hear you guys come in."

Peter glanced between Bruce and Tony and said, in a vastly abbreviated version of his original speech, "Uh...well...I was just wondering ifyouthoughtIshouldaskMJout?"

"I'm sorry, what?" Bruce asked.

"Never mind, forget it," Peter said. He was blushing slightly.

"No, Peter, what? I'm listening but I really didn't understand you."

It was hard for Tony to tell whether Peter or Bruce was more pained by the way this conversation was going.

Bruce continued, "It's okay, take your time." He gave Peter a kind smile. Even though the smile wasn't aimed at Tony, it made him feel a swell of affection for Bruce.

Peter cleared his throat and said, "You remember my friend MJ?"

"Sure, from academic decathlon?"

"Yeah! I was wondering if you thought I should ask her out? Like...like on a date?"

Bruce blinked in surprise. "I mean...yes? If...if you want to? I...I'm probably not...you should maybe ask Tony for advice about that kind of thing."

Tony grinned smugly.

Peter said, "Well, I did, and he said yes, and May said yes, and Ned said yes, and Karen said yes, but I just...uh, you know, wanted to collect some more data."

"Sorry, who's Karen?" Bruce asked.

"Oh, Karen's my suit lady."

"What?" Bruce asked.

"God, kid, you can't call her your 'suit lady', that sounds too weird," Tony said. "She's the AI who runs the spider-suit."

"Oh. You named her Karen?" Bruce asked.

" _I_ didn't. Peter did. Why'd you pick Karen, anyway?" He'd never asked.

Peter shrugged. "I dunno. She seemed like a Karen."

"Hmm. Yeah, I guess she does seem like a Karen," Tony agreed.

"Okay…so what did Karen say?" Bruce asked.

"Oh, Karen's always super supportive. But, like, I don't know, like she told me I should try to kiss Liz--"

"Who's Liz?" Bruce asked. The little crinkle he got on his forehead when he was confused was so cute.

"Oh...she moved away, it was--uhh...it's a long story, but she was so nice. And smart. And pretty, like, really pretty...well, anyway, Karen told me I should try to kiss her but like, I was wearing the suit, obviously, since Karen was there, and it was just, I actually think it would have been weird, even if the elevator hadn't fallen down...anyway so sometimes I don't know about Karen, I think she might just say what I want to hear?"

Bruce glanced at Tony with a curious expression. "That's the kind of advice your AI gives?"

Tony shrugged. "She was mostly programmed for risk analysis and defensive maneuvers, but...my AIs are learning programs! They adapt to their environments."

"What about FRIDAY? What kind of dating advice does she give?" Bruce asked.

"I don't know, I haven't asked," Tony said. JARVIS used to offer Tony plenty of unprompted advice, dating and otherwise, but FRIDAY wasn't as prone to that. Tony still wasn't sure how he felt about the change. "Why, do you think I need some?! Do you want some?"

Bruce laughed. "No, I think you're doing fine, and I'm beyond help. Just, you know, if Peter's trying to collect advice, maybe she'd have some."

"I'm always available for advice," FRIDAY said helpfully. "All you have to do is ask."

Peter sighed. "Thanks, FRIDAY. But, well, what I'm saying, is--is, no offense, Mr. Stark, you know I love Karen, but I'm just not sure how reliable she is, at that particular kind of thing. Like, all she knows about MJ is what I've told her."

"That's pretty much all we know about her, too. But we know _you_ , and you're great. Why _wouldn't_ she want to go on a date with you?" Tony said, offended by the very idea.

"Well--okay, again, no offense, Mr. Stark, but that's kind of why I wanted to ask Dr. Banner? Because--because, you know, you're...like, a celebrity? And you're so--uh, confident? And you've been with--I--uh--well, no offense--"

"We're both pretty hard to offend," Tony said. He was deeply amused by Peter's verbal gymnastics as he struggled not to effectively call Tony a slut and Bruce a loser.

"Right. Well, uh, just, seriously, no offense, but Dr. Banner, I thought maybe you'd...understand a little bit more? Where I'm coming from? Because...you're...it's different?"

"Yeah, no, I get it, but I really am not qualified to give advice about this stuff."

"You two are both literally superheroes," Tony said. "You do actually dangerous stuff all the time. And you're afraid, what? You ask someone out and she says 'no'? _That's_ scary?"

"You told me you didn't think she would say no!" Peter protested.

"Well--I _don't_ think she would, but I'm just saying, if that's the worst thing that could happen? No big deal, right? Ask someone else. It's not like, you know, fighting a supervillain. That's way worse."

Bruce and Peter looked up at Tony with matching expressions of confusion.

"What? I can't just ask someone _else_ ," Peter said. "I mean, I like _her_."

"It's like anything. You need to practice, and it gets easier. I've been rejected _plenty_ of times," Tony said.

"Really?" Peter asked skeptically.

"C'mon, Bruce, back me up. It's not the end of the world. Like, we've literally been at the end of the world. That was worse than getting rejected."

Bruce squirmed in his seat before saying, softly, "I don't know, actually? I--I've never--"

"You've never been rejected?" Peter asked curiously.

Bruce shook his head. "I mean I--well, I guess I've never asked...anyone...anything, um, romantically?"

Tony blinked. "You've been with other people." It wasn't a question; Bruce had made occasional fleeting references to past relationships. Mostly Betty, but not only.

"I, uh, yeah, but I've always been asked...usually...in a very direct fashion."

Bruce looked over at Tony with a helpless expression on his face, and Tony laughed. He did remember how ineffective all his subtle attempts at flirtation with Bruce had been, and how sweetly bewildered Bruce had been when Tony finally managed to communicate his interest. And that had even been before they'd talked about their poly arrangement and Pepper had expressed _her_ interest. Tony didn't think Peter needed to know all of those details, though.

"Well, there you go," Tony said. "Bruce is right, you shouldn't take advice from him. His technique is just to make other people do the work for him."

Peter slumped in his seat a little. "Yeah, I think girls like it when the guy asks."

"Well," Bruce said. "Not necessarily."

"Really?" Peter asked.

"I, um, I mean, I've...been asked. By women. Before." Bruce bit his lip. "In retrospect, they probably...had gotten tired of waiting for me to...but at the time I didn't...uh…."

"Yeah, that sounds about right," Tony said, cutting Bruce off before he could finish. He was pretty sure Bruce had been going to say something along the lines of not being able to understand why anyone would want to be with him, which Peter probably didn't need to hear. Bruce walked such a fine line between being adorably clueless and heartbreakingly depressing.

"But it all worked out! Um, until it didn't," Bruce said. He stared off into space, and Tony realized he'd better do something before Bruce got tangled up too badly in the past. Peter didn't know much about Bruce's pre-Avengers life and probably hadn't noticed how much turmoil he was causing. Tony knew the kid would never do anything to upset Bruce on purpose, and not just for fear of a Hulk out.

Tony crossed the room and came to stand in front of Bruce and Peter. He casually set a hand on Bruce's shoulder and said to Peter, "Hey, kid, let me see your phone."

He felt Bruce tense, then relax, as he registered Tony's hand on him. Peter only tensed and said, "What? Why?"

"Give me your phone, I'll ask her out."

"I think she's a little young for you," Bruce said. Tony hid a smile. He'd gotten Bruce back. He kept his left hand on Bruce's shoulder while holding out the right to Peter, for his phone.

"For Peter," he said, with an exaggerated eyeroll. "I'll ask her out for Peter."

Peter clutched his phone. "No--no, um, thanks Mr. Stark, but I don't think she'd like that."

Tony grinned. "Good! That was a test. You passed."

Peter looked relieved, but didn't let up his firm grip on his phone. 

"Maybe you should ask Pepper what she thinks," Bruce said.

"Not that Pepper wouldn't have great advice, but you're both wildly overthinking this," Tony said. He gave up on getting Peter's phone, which he hadn't really wanted in the first place, and perched on the arm of the couch next to Bruce.

Bruce said, "Tony's probably right--" 

"-- _Probably_? That's a weird way to pronounce _definitely always_ ," Tony said.

Bruce shook his head and started over. "Tony's probably right about overthinking things, but I get how you feel, Peter. For what it's worth, I--I was always very grateful whenever someone, um, made their intentions clear to me. If nobody ever did any, you know, asking, that would...be rough. So, uh...even though, believe me, I know it's hard...uh, I think you should tell her how you feel. Because...it's worth the awkwardness to find out. When you can have that kind of connection with someone, it's...it's, um, really great." Bruce looked shyly sideways at Tony as he finished up his convoluted statement.

Tony smiled and stroked Bruce's forearm. Bruce wasn't the most verbally demonstrative person, and Tony didn't usually need him to be. But it was still nice to hear the occasional sweet sentiment make its way out of Bruce's cluttered mind into the air for Tony to hear.

Peter sighed. "Yeah, I just…" His phone chimed and he looked down at it in surprise. "Oh, oh my god, MJ wants to know if I want to go to a found footage film festival with her on Friday night? Is...do you guys think that's a date?"

"Probably?" Bruce said.

Tony rolled his eyes and said, fondly, "You two are both just so lucky you're cute."


End file.
